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Beauty Trends : An Ode To Malls

Fame was like a drug. But what was even more like a drug were the drugs. I can’t go to juvie. They use guys like me as currency. Uh, no, they’re saying “Boo-urns, Boo-urns.” A woman is a lot like a refrigerator. Six feet tall, 300 pounds…it makes ice.

Beer. Now there’s a temporary solution. Get ready, skanks! It’s time for the truth train! When I held that gun in my hand, I felt a surge of power…like God must feel when he’s holding a gun. Shoplifting is a victimless crime. Like punching someone in the dark. Aaah! Natural light! Get it off me! Get it off me!

I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals flaming. And now, in the spirit of the season: start shopping. And for every dollar of Krusty merchandise you buy, I will be nice to a sick kid. For legal purposes, sick kids may include hookers with a cold. That’s why I love elementary school, Edna. The children believe anything you tell them. I was saying “Boo-urns.” This is the greatest case of false advertising I’ve seen since I sued the movie “The Never Ending Story.”

  • I’ve done everything the Bible says — even the stuff that contradicts the other stuff!
  • Fame was like a drug. But what was even more like a drug were the drugs.
  • That’s why I love elementary school, Edna. The children believe anything you tell them.
  • I didn’t get rich by signing checks.

Beer. Now there’s a temporary solution. Get ready, skanks! It’s time for the truth train! When I held that gun in my hand, I felt a surge of power…like God must feel when he’s holding a gun. Shoplifting is a victimless crime. Like punching someone in the dark. Aaah! Natural light! Get it off me! Get it off me!

What’s the point of going out? We’re just going to wind up back here anyway. What good is money if it can’t inspire terror in your fellow man? And here I am using my own lungs like a sucker. But, Aquaman, you cannot marry a woman without gills. You’re from two different worlds… Oh, I’ve wasted my life.

  1. Dad didn’t leave… When he comes back from the store, he’s going to wave those pop-tarts right in your face!
  2. Oh, loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix.

Oh, loneliness and cheeseburgers are a dangerous mix. Fame was like a drug. But what was even more like a drug were the drugs. Well, he’s kind of had it in for me ever since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace “accidentally” with “repeatedly” and replace “dog” with “son.” Human contact: the final frontier.

Beauty Trends : An Ode To Malls

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